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What You Won't See in the Alleged Joe Jonas Sex Tape

By Brandon Voss

OK, first of all, this is clearly a fake photo of Joe Jonas that we dug up. Hot, right?

If you follow aging teen heartthrob news, you've probably heard rumors that a raunchy sex tape allegedly starring Joe Jonas may soon be released. According to Blind Gossip, the video features explicit footage of the 23-year-old Jonas Brother and model girlfriend Blanda Eggenschwiler "drinking, doing drugs, and engaging in sex using a number of sex toys and BDSM devices, including dildos, a gag ball, and a slapper paddle." Whaaaaat?!

According to "multiple tips," the sex tape's release is being orchestrated by Eggenschwiler, who basically wants to be the next Kim Kardashian. "The couple is very vocal and there is a lot of overly dramatic screaming and moaning," the report continues. "The sex is explicit, and there are multiple close-up shots of Joe’s face, penis and testicles." 

Say it ain't so, Joe! Better yet, please say that it is!

"There is no truth or validity to the story," a rep for Joe Jonas tells TMZ. "It is completely false."

Boo. Even Joe himself has tweeted about the ridiculousness of the rumors:

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