As usual, Stephen Colbert has it all figured out.
"Should gays and lesbians be allowed to marry?" he said, teasing his first segment on LGBT rights on Wednesday. "Yes, but only each other."
Colbert points out that conservatives favor equal rights, as noted by a Fox News report he found. Even with the supposedly quick progress of equality, some things are less clear-cut.
"At this rate, I even have to learn what the last two letters of LGBT mean," he warned. "I want to say, bacon and tomato?"
Colbert really made his point, though, in the second segment — "The Word" — when he skewered Paul Clement, the lawyer defending the Defense of Marriage Act before the Supreme Court.
Be sure to watch both videos below.